THE SMART INDIAN

Long long ago so long ago there lived a very Smart Indian. One fine day while he was doing his routine job, he suddenly got an idea. He immediately converted his idea into an Invention. All the other Indians who were also smart but not as smart as him were amazed by his invention. Everyone congratulated him on his fine invention. The King summoned him to his court and honored him. He asked the Smart Indian to invent many such things. The Smart Indian felt very happy. The other Indians asked the Smart Indian’s permission to use his invention, for which he agreed happily. For he took pride in his invention being used by others.

Another fine day an Arab came to the Smart Indian’s village. There he saw the people using something new. He came to know that it was the Smart Indian’s invention. So he went to the Smart Indian and asked him to give him a piece of his invention for which he would pay him 5 bucks. The Smart Indian felt really happy now. Not only his invention will be used by a foreigner but also he will get paid for it. So he agreed for it instantly. And the Arab took the invention to his country and started using it there.

                Again another fine day when a Britisher went to the Arab to do business, he saw the invention of the Smart Indian. He enquired the Arab about the invention and its inventor. He saw a great potential for the invention. So he took a ship and made a voyage to India to meet the Smart Indian. When he found him, he made a business agreement with the Smart Indian. That he would pay him 2 bucks more than the Arab and the Smart Indian had to produce many pieces of his invention which he would sell in his country. Now the Smart Indian was overwhelmed with happiness and agreed for the business deal.

                

                The Britisher took the invention to his country and started selling them for 15 bucks. He got richer by the day. And an American, who saw this, got an idea. He said that he would invent something similar but much better than it. So he puts a lot of effort and invents an improved version of the Indian’s invention. Everyone was amazed by the new improved version. They start buying the new invention from the American even though it was 3 bucks more costly than what the Britisher sold.

                

                And a Chinese who saw all these got an even bigger idea. He said that he would invent something similar to the American’s invention and sell it at half the price. As he knew the American’s invention was an improved version of the Indian’s invention, he bribes a politician from the Smart Indian’s village and asks him to steal the procedure of producing the Indian’s invention for which he would pay him 50 bucks. And then the Chinese started producing the invention and sold them for 9 bucks. Since the Chinese sold the products at a lower price, others’ business fell down.

                

                The Smart Indian who was now left jobless, went to the Chinese. He told the Chinese that he has an idea by which he can produce the product at even lesser cost. So the Chinese employs the Smart Indian to produce his product at lower cost and paid him 1 buck for each piece. The Smart Indian felt very very happy. And lived happily ever after.

KAVITHE

Hi one and all. Been long since I posted anything worthwhile. Ok, anything at all. So that's why I post here this poem that I wrote when I was in my 2nd PUC or 12th as some people say. Its in Kannada. And guess what.? It fetched me 2nd prize in the competition.

What big deal you ask..??

Its a big deal indeed I say. Its like Rakhi Sawant being awarded for her Acting skills. :D

ರೈನ್ ರೈನ್ ಗೋ ಅವೆ

ಆಕಾಶದ ಕಡೆ ನೋಟ
ಮಳೆ ಬರುವುದು ಎಂಬ ಆಸೆ
ಒಣಗಿದ ಬೆಳೆಯ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಚಿಂತೆ
ಸಾಲ ಹೇಗೆ ತೀರಿಸುವುದು ಎಂಬ ಆಲೋಚನೆ
ಮುರಿದು ಹೋದ ಕನಸುಗಳು
ಒಣಗಿ ಹೋದ ಹೊಟ್ಟೆಗಳು
ಭವಿಷ್ಯದ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಭಯ
ಮಳೆಯನ್ನು ನಿರೀಕ್ಷಿಸಿ ಕುಳಿತಿದ್ದ ರೈತ.
ಹೀಗೆ ಇರುವಾಗ, ತನ್ನ ಪುಟ್ಟ ಮಗನ
ಸಂತೋಷ ಗಾನ
"ರೈನ್ ರೈನ್ ಗೋ ಅವೆ"

You thought I would leave you with a poem in a language which most of you dont understand..? You Dumb-ass..!!  Ya I like to show-off. But that is not the intention behind this post. I posted this poem as my FB status few days back and since my friends who did not understand the language, wanted to know the meaning, I tried to translate it using Google translator. And this what it translated it as.

Rain Rain Go Away

Side view of the sky
Rain coming from the desire
Worry about the dry crop
How does the idea of ​​debt tirisuvudu
Went broke Dreams
Sear hottegalu
About the fear of the future
Farmers wait for rain and sitting.
Thus, while his little son
Pleased with regina
"Rain, Rain Go Away"

This is like the Kolaveri version of my poem. :P
And who the Hell is Regina..??

P.S: Kavithe means poetry in Kannada..:-)

Diwali Celebration

Lots of commotion(didn't find a better word to describe it) at office. Deepavali celebrations is being organised with Floor decoration, Ethnic wear, Rangoli and other things. I'm not that guy who actively participates in these kind of activities, unless threatened at gunpoint or a pretty lass comes by and asks for some help. I would better go to sleep on my desk. That's why I slid down my chair and made sure that no one noticed me being free. But damn, few people have Hawk-eyes. They made me drape all the pillars with shiny orange cloth.

Oh yeah. On the theme part. They have given our floor the Kadamba. What..?? You do not know Kadambas..?? You gotta be kidding me. Kadamba.. The Kadamba Dynasty. The empire which ruled the Karnataka region during 345-525 A.D. Ok I wiki-ed the year part. But still. You must be remembering something from your primary school History class. Ok forget it. They have given us the Kadamba dynasty. And the floor colour is Yellow. So they have pasted this yellow cellophane papers across all the lights. Now it feels like the whole floor has got Jaundice.

Wait a moment.

Sorry for the interruption. Some guy asked me to decorate my cubicle. With flowers. My cubicle now looks like a First-night room. I always wondered about the cubicles. Particularly that of women. They have this teddy bears, printed coffee mugs, paper weights, cactus, interesting key-chains, pics of theirs/friend's/brother's/sister's/neighbor's babies, plastic flowers, pen stand with pens of all colors and other God-knows-what things. My(or in general a guy's) cubicle looks like a barren land when compared to theirs. Just a paper with short-cut keys for vim and linux commands. What was God thinking when he created Eve. Hmmph. Only God knows.

When I went to get coffee, I saw that the whole pantry was transformed into a Rangoli pitch/field. It looked superb. I could have been of some help. Now drop that raised eye-brows. Ya I can draw Rangoli. Better than most girls. Especially the Pulli-kolam(I do not know what they call it in other languages. Its a form of rangoli where you first keep the dots, then you connect them or interlace them using various patterns creating various designs. Google is acting a little weird today, I will post the pic later). If I had participated in any Rangoli competition, I would have given the girls a run for their money. But I thought that it would be too Gay to do that. And when did Sherwani become ethnic wear for South-Indian men..? Stupid, I say.

Do you know whats the most difficult thing at a work place. No, its not working for 12 or 14 or 16hrs that's difficult. It's when you don't have any work and still have to act like you are very busy with lotsa work, that my Friend, is the most difficult thing. I feel guilty sometimes. They pay me so much, and I'm sitting here, blogging and ridiculing their efforts to make us happy and comfortable.

Whatever..!!

This is my 3rd post in the last 3 days. Kinda record for me. Hope I keep up the good work...:-)

P.S: Google is acting really weird. Its throwing up lots of Errors. If possible I will post this today(21st Oct) orelse there's always another day. I'm not launching rockets after all..;-)

The Buzzzzzing BEE

Aahh. Have you ever experienced the feeling where you are constantly under disturbance. Its not annoyance mind it. Just disturbance. That's what I have been experiencing since few days. To say exactly since the past 3-4 days. Its like you are sitting in a park trying to think hard about something but suddenly a bee comes by, Buzzing around.
"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"...
"zzzzzzzzzzz"...
"zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"...

You just flicker your hand to shoo off the bee and then again it comes back buzzing.
"zzzzzzzzzzzz"...
"zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"...
"zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"...

Its just pure disturbance. Not letting me think about anything. And I'm unable to catch this bee and kill it or atleast catch it, put it in a box and throw it far away. Its all fully disturbed for me right now. Ok now let me rant about few things here.

My seating location was changed for the fourth time in the last 40 days. It was actually my entire team. But still. At first my cubicle was beside 2 pretty things. Then they said they were doing some re-ordering and sent our entire team to a small lab on the below floor. That lab was smaller than an average Computer lab in a High school. Then they scattered us all around that floor. Then they called us back to our previous floor. And my manager made me sit in a cubicle that is beside his. As though its gonna bother me..;-) And then he went on-site.

The irritating part here is, once you sit in a place it takes time to get accustomed to the environment. To find out all the good looking women on that floor and know their locations and the distance between you and the nearest good looking one. When I'm done with all this things, they pull me out of there and throw me in a new place. Aarghhhh.

I have been wanting to write a lot. But instead of writing I end up reading. Its the blog I'm talking about. Not that I dont have ideas to write. I'm a bit lazy. Ok, much more than bit.  What..?? Ok I'm a lazy-ass who doesn't even move his bum right to left. I know you are no less. But the thing is, even before writing I start thinking What to write..? How to write..? When to write..? And end up not writing at all. I didn't even have much work at office lately.

So I end up reading blogs whenever I feel like writing a post. Then I made up my mind yesterday and posted this. Not that I posted something good. But something is always better than nothing, isn't it.? I still want to write more. And keep the promise I made to my blog. But then who cares. I also need to change its look. I'm getting bored with it. But not now. I'm very much disturbed.

Ah..!! The happy part. I'm leaving for home tomorrow, for Deepavali. Will be a week long holiday. In case any of you read this before Deepavali, here you go "Happy Deepavali"..:-) Wear new dress, eat lotsa sweets, light lotsa diyas, burst crackers, burn your fingers. Ok not the last one. But have a blast. I shall go home, catch that bee, tie it to a Rocket and send it away to the skies. And by the way, theres a love story coming around. Keep reading. :-)

My favorite Jingles.

I know people get hooked to songs. But ads..?? Yes they do. And I'm one of them. By Ads I mean jingles. In the present day scenario where each and everything is advertised to such an extent that they get on to your nerve, we don't even want to remember those ads after a few moments. But few, very few of them get your attention. And even fewer of them get etched into your memory forever. The sudden spurt of happiness you get when you see or hear them is just priceless.

          So some of the ads which caught my attention and will always remain etched in my memory due to their catchy tunes are as follows in the order of their priority.

1. This ones a gem. I'm not a regular Tea/Coffee guy. But if my Coffee is served with this ambiance every morning and this jingle playing in the background. I dont mind becoming a Coffee addict.

               


2. Ah. I just love this song. I can mumble it all day long and still be not bored by it. But there was a time when I had a HUTCH prepaid connection and every time I called their Customer care, they used to make me wait with this song running in loop, like for infinity. Now that bitterness has turned into a sweet love..:-)

               
In case you too wanna mumble it, here's the lyrics.

                             You and I, in this beautiful world, 

                                   Green grass, blue skies,
                                    In this beautiful world
                      You and I, winding lanes as streams go by,
                             You and I, in this beautiful world...

3. Very few ads connect rightly with their theme. If a soft-drink says Limca-Do Pal Taazgi, then this coveys it the best way. And Adah Sharma looks too good to be described in few words.

               

4. This is one among those which leaves you wanting more. I can never get enough of it.

               

5. How can this list be complete without the famous Airtel ad with Rahman in it. But it made only to the last position. Thats due to the overuse of it. I have never seen a jingle exploited to such level.

               

       There are still many others, but these are my top 5. And I like them just for their Jingles(or to say, for their music), nothing else...:-)

I'm Hungry..!!

It was 11:00 p.m. Sahil was dropped at his house by the office cab. He lived there with his friend. But his friend was not at home that day. He went to his native to attend his cousin’s marriage, 2 days ago. He would be coming the next morning. Sahil hurried up to his house in the second floor. He unlocked the door quickly and got in. He went to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator to find something to eat. Only the empty bottles of Teacher’s Choice, Signature, Blackdog and others stood there. He found a little amount of Sprite left in a bottle. Quickly grabbed it and poured it in his mouth.

“Did it even wet my tongue”? He thought.

It was late. All the restaurants were closed while he was returning in the cab. Even the road side eateries were not there. He thought he could find something at home. Ankit always kept something to eat at home.

“Oh, what shall I do now”? He thought again. He was hungry beyond he could explain. Then he filled a glass full of water, dumped lots of sugar in it, stirred and drank it in a gulp.

“May be this will hold that Hunger-demon for a while”, he said to himself. He then went and hit the bed.

The clock struck 12. Sahil woke up and sat on the bed and gave a huge grunt. The pain was unbearable. The sweetness of sugar was no match for the audacity of the Hunger-demon. He felt like someone was playing with a flail in his stomach. He got up and went into the kitchen again. He searched all the containers to find something that he could eat. He found nothing but sugar, salt, oil and other things but nothing which he can cook. He gave a deep thought about something.

He then lit the stove and placed a kadai on it, poured oil into that. He left it to heat up. Then he prepared a marinade with whatever he could find in the kitchen. He mixed it well. Just when the oil was about to boil, he smeared the marinade over his hands and dipped them into the kadai. He simmered it around in the kadai. After 5mins he took them out. They were perfectly cooked, like a deep fried chicken. He took it to his nose and smelled it.

“Perfect”, he said. Then he took a bite of it.

“Oh My God.!!", shuddered Sahil on his bed gasping for air.

“What kind of dream was that?”, he thought. He was shivering and sweating profusely. His throat went dry. He wiped the sweat off his forehead and suddenly felt something different. He switched on the lights. His blood Froze when he saw his “Deep fried hands”.

SUPERORGANISMS

I myself do not know why or what I’m posting. May be just to keep the promise I made to my blog that I will regularly be in contact with him. So let’s dissect this post a little. WHY am I posting this..?? Well you see, facebook has been blocked at my office since last week. And there haven’t been any BUGS recently to bug me. And I can’t leave the office without completing 9hrs. There you go, 9hrs at office without work or facebook. What else to do. And I think someone said, “Make hay while the sun shines”. So you got the answer for WHY.

                

                    Now lets come to WHAT. But explaining what I’m posting here becomes the WHAT part here. Kind of a Paradox isn’t it..?? Ok lets not digress. Then I thought maybe I could post something here. So what shall I post? See I have this habit of Googling about random things. When I say random, its Random. Anything under, above or around the sun, even a few light years away from it. About people, places, events, softwares, movies, just about anything. But then, I didn’t search anything on Google today. And when I thought about searching something on it nothing came to my mind which was worth searching.

                

                   Then it struck me. The incident that happened today morning. I got up as usual at 6:30 a.m. cursing myself for not being a Sanyasi. Then started with my morning chores. As I was carrying on with my business, I saw these ants. The small black ones that don’t bite you.  They sometimes steal your sugar from your shelves. Those ants. As they were moving along the wall they seemed like they were dashing/colliding with each other. Like they were blindfolded and couldn’t see who was coming in front of them. But then they didn’t seem like they were dashing/colliding with each other. It looked like they were greeting each other.

                

                  Not that I never noticed this before but it never intrigued me so much. May be this was the first time I noticed this while in loo. It’s the place where you are all by yourself. Your fortress of solitude. The place where your past comes as slideshows, your present feels pleasant and your future looks clear. If it was Banyan tree for Buddha, it’s the loo for many of us. So I sat there wondering why they did so. But as it was getting late for the office I had to flush the toilet as well my thoughts then.

                

                 So I typed on Google, “Why do ants touch each other while moving”. Tingggg came the results. As I dwelled through them I came to know that it was their way of communicating. Their way of telling the other ant that the route they are following it safe, that they could find the food there or its waste following the path. Its how they pass on the message from one ant to the other. Their primary mode of communication is through smell. The different combination of chemicals specifies different commands. And these commands are followed obediently by each one of them. Have you ever observed that when you pull an ant out of its line it somehow again falls back into the line. This is due to the trail of chemicals left behind by the other ants. They are highly organizational creatures.

                

                 Coming to the point. What is that I’m trying to say.? Nothing. Or may be theres something we all can learn from those tiny ants. Discipline, Obedience, Trust, Helpfulness and Teamwork. They are such small beings yet so good at these basic characteristics that a Human should possess. But guess how many of us possess at least a few of those..?? I will let you answer that…

                

                So, from shit to philosophy. Wonder how strange this human mind works. Anyways let’s not get too serious. I don’t want the Joker come ask me “Whyyy so Seriousss”..?? :-)